Sunday, July 22, 2012

On dusty roads...

Like a paper scribbled doodles, thoughts sent and agreed upon..
Cosmos agrees but do not let be,of distance do nothing.
Rebel, captured moments... most of all...sync....sync of the body,mind and soul,..
not forced upon but chanced. 
You,born of water...stand not still,for stagnant it is not you.
but change the path, you follow through .

Shared dreams of dusty roads and strangers to meet,shared thoughts - changes wanted and changes seeked.
and to end it all.....Well thats the pity!!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

The dull ache..never healed, never completely gone..
a reminder at unwanted hours.. a silent threat, permitting never a free spirit,
decision - tell me what right and what need?

Pull towards reality;never yearned.Of blissful oblivious escape craved.
Just a dull ache...

Saturday, February 12, 2011

My Little Princess

The house seemed unusually silent, how I wish I could trade it to all for the mayhem that prevailed just days before. Now amidst the cacophony of silence...all that I could hear were the voices that are preserved in my head of bygone years.

My baby girl was married!!

Days before the marriage..a world of chaos:barked instructions,mad run to the tailors,
umpteen number of trips to jewellers , sarees, relatives , invitations, caterers, more relatives , pandits, poojas, some more relatives.....
How I wish, I had slowed everything down and did things my heart wanted to do...Hold my little girl's hand,take a stroll with her, tell her how much happiness she brought into my life... tell her the first time I saw her wet pink face I knew God had answered my prayers...How my husband,her father ,who wanted a son, was won over the moment she held his finger...
Tell her, how we both were stunned when she spoke her first word- "FAN"...how she gave us sleepless nights the time she caught that awful flu...how she annoyed me when she decided to get her hair colored purple...how my eyes welled up the first time I saw her with her now husband. . . how I still worried about her lack of culinary skills...Most of all I wanted to tell her how much I loved her, loved her so much that "love" had taken a whole new meaning....

Now that last of the guests are gone, we both - your father and I, sit in silence, in this empty house devoid of things to say to each other..for we spoke only of you and to think that you" my little baby doll" was all grown up now and left us to start a life of your own, I cannot but wonder with a silent ache if we will remain an important part of life, if you will remember to call us, now that your priorities are going to change...

The phone rings, bringing us both out of our reverie..I pick up the phone,the panicky voice on the other end makes me smile -"Mom, you have to help me cook tonight's dinner...This is what we will do, I will put you on the speaker and you have to give me step by step instructions ,mom.....". My smile widens, she was my little princess after all................




Wednesday, April 14, 2010

My first attempt at creating something

Everything plunged into darkness. Cursing the electricity board, I groped in the darkness to find the candles I had recently bought after I read the announcements in the newspaper about the scheduled power cuts throughout the city. I found it next to the TV set, a place I knew I would not miss.

The flames gently swayed giving off a nostalgic yellow light. Cursing again, this time because I was missing out my favorite reality show (why I like the show, is a mystery even to me). Resigning myself to the fact that the power is not going to be back for another hour, I did the next best thing I knew to kill time. I picked up my cell phone to text my best friend for the latest update of college gossip. Halfway through my text, the display switched off which made me realize I had not charged the batteries of my cell phone. Frustrated, I just walked to the window and looked outside but all the stared back was more darkness.

Not knowing what else to do, I laid down on the sofa wondering as to how to kill an hour without TV, Cell phone and i-pod( I had lent to a friend of mine, which I deeply regretted now). It must have been about 10 minutes since the power was shut down when I heard someone knocking on the door, relieved that my roomie must be back earlier than usual, I went to answer the door.

“Who is it?” I asked. With all the murders in the city, it does not hurt to ask is it? Expecting my usual retort of “It’s me dumbo, your roomie…whom did you expect? DiCaprio???(The names of the actor would change with the latest movie she watched), I was surprised to hear a child’s voice, “It’s me aunty, your neighbor.” I was annoyed that I had an unexpected guest, a kid at that and the fact that I was being addressed as aunty annoyed me even more.

I opened the door to find a girl of about eight years of age standing in front of me. I remember having seen the girl a few times playing on the street. She was pretty in a way that makes all small girls pretty, but what made her stand out was her mop of curly hair, a feature I seemed to share with her. Its not that I hate small children, I do not mind staying away from them if I had an option to do so. Praying, that this would not take more time. I asked “What is it sweetie?”

“Aunty my parents are not at home and I was scared to stay alone at home. Can I stay with you until the power comes back?” she asked.

My mind raced back to the time when I used to be petrified of the darkness, I knew I could not say no to this. I said “Okay, come inside.” I let her inside the house.

She came inside gingerly and sat on the chair. I took my place back on the sofa. There was an awkward silence between us. I always had a problem starting a conversation with strangers, even if the stranger was an eight year old. The silence stretched for a long time.

“So which class are you in?” I had to start somewhere. “I study in 3rd standard aunty”, she replied. I was annoyed that she was calling me aunty again. I said, “You can call me by my name sweetie.” I then asked her where her parents were, I learnt that both of them worked and she was used to staying alone at home, until now that the government had decided to do away with power for an hour.

I started humming to myself now that I had exhausted my set of questions. Surprisingly, she started singing the song. I admit I am no Beethoven, but this girl surely knew how to sing. Mesmerized I asked her to sing another song, without hesitation she started singing another beautiful song. This went for another five songs which I thoroughly enjoyed. It was so wonderful I did not realize a whole hour had passed until the lights came back. I was so happy that I gave a whole bar of chocolates I usually kept to eat when I am watching a rented romantic comedy movie.

It is strange how little things make your day, today this little angel made my day. I told her she could come to me everytime there was a power cut but only if she promised a song everyday and asked her to tell her parents not to worry.

This continued for an almost the whole summer at the end of which we both shared a strong bond. I also came to that she was also interested in books like me, for a tender age of eight she had graduated to reading pride and prejudice and seemed to appreciate it too. She was also excellent in picking up languages; she already knew to speak all the south Indian languages. At times, when I was home early I could take her out for ice cream, went to the park or did what we both loved the most sing. Summer was coming to an end and rains was no longer a problem and the newspapers announced that the power cuts were withdrawn but my beautiful relationship with the girl did not need power cuts anymore.

I was in college, sitting in canteen sipping a coffee latte when my visibly relieved friend read aloud the article in the newspaper announcing the withdrawal of the power cuts. “There you go, I can get back to watching my reality show…about time too, and you know the contestant have reached the final leg of the journey. ….Damn these power cuts I missed almost the whole season…. I was not listening; I smiled to myself because for once I was glad of the power cuts and instead of an I pod I listened to a tiny little angel sing………………….

P.S: Sanju this one is for you, for all the support :)

P.P.S: Sorry Sanju could not resist the P.S


Wednesday, February 10, 2010

My first blog

My first blog...well,what better topic to write(oops...blog)than about blogging itself. when blogging first gained momentum, i wondered who is their sane mind would want to write about their most private thought(s) and then want the workd to read about it. now, that I have started a blog on my own it is quite obvious that I have a different view point. I now see it as a platform to express my views and draw people with similar thoughts or better still people with constructive criticism.
It is amazing how a person can sit behind a desk and write something and maybe...just maybe, touch the heart and soul of another person. Its a tall order...I know, but whats life without optimism, faith and just that little bit of child like trust that makes life so much more fulfilling.
Ok, now for a confession(for soul cleansing???)the idea of blogging first emerged after I saw the movie" You have got a mail". I must admit, even at the cost of being called a pathetic loser, I have watched that movie a zillion time and it never ceases to amaze me and reinforce my faith in soulmates(not necessarily in the romantic sense). I have enjoyed reading mails from "Shopgirl" and "NY152" almost in the first person (wink...wink..)... it is just as ironic as it is truthful to know that it is strangely liberating and un-intimidating to give that peek into your mind to a complete stranger who has no pre-conceived ideas about you and to do it behind the security of anonymity is exciting. Just think about it, the two protagonists of the movie sent mails about seemingly unimportant things like butterfly on a subway train, pet dog and people ordering coffee in a cafe.
Well, with similar excitement of expressing thoughts and silly blabbers...I sign off..Happy Blogging to me...scribble...scribble...